Empire Puns

Roman Empire Puns

I can’t believe it’s not butter, it’s just olive oil! They had it in Rome.
When in Rome, do as the Romans do... and bring pizza!
Why did the Roman chicken cross the road? To get to the other forum.
The Roman architect was great at building bridges; he really knew how to span the gap.
When the Romans played hide and seek, they always said, 'I’ll be back!'
Why was the Roman Empire so great? They had a lot of 'aqua' duct tape!
I wanted to become a gladiator, but I couldn’t find a good arena!
The Roman soldier loved his job; he really had a sword to protect!
Why did the Roman senator never get lost? He had a great sense of direction!
I told my friend I was going to build a Colosseum, but he said it was a 'dome' idea!
Why did the Romans always bring a pencil to battle? To draw their swords!
I heard the Romans invented the calendar, but they could never find a date!
Why did the Roman soldier break up with his girlfriend? She was too much of a 'drama' queen!
The Roman baker always knew how to raise his dough.
I tried to join the Roman army, but they said I lacked 'courage' and 'bravery'!
Why was the Roman Empire so wealthy? They had a lot of 'interest' in tax!
The Roman poet was so good, he really knew how to 'verse' his thoughts!
Why did Julius Caesar always carry a pencil? In case he needed to draw a line!
The Roman historian wrote a book on time travel, but it was a bit 'chronically' confusing!
Why did the Roman gladiator always bring a ladder? To reach new heights in the arena!
I asked a Roman how to get to the forum, and he said, 'Just follow the 'path' of least resistance!'

British Empire Puns

The British Empire had a great tea party, but the biscuits crumbled under pressure!
Why did the British Empire love sailing? They found it quite 'ship-shape'!
I tried to tell my friend a joke about the British Empire, but it fell flat like a crumpet!
What did the British soldier say to the tea? 'You’re brewtiful!'
Why was the British Empire's currency always happy? Because it had a lot of 'pound' signs!
I wanted to start a British Empire-themed bakery, but I couldn't find the right 'scone'!
Why did the British Empire like chess? It was a great way to check their mates!
I heard the British Empire had a great sense of humor; they always 'pun' before noon!
Why did the British Empire love gardening? They knew how to grow an 'empire' of flowers!
The British Empire's favorite game is Monopoly; they always want to own 'Boardwalk'!
I told my friend I was joining the British Empire, but he said I should 'watch my tea'!
Why was the British Empire always so polite? They knew how to 'queue' up for success!
The British Empire's favorite movie? 'Tea' and 'Sympathy'!
Why did the British Empire always win at poker? They had a good 'royal' flush!
I tried to write a song about the British Empire, but it just didn't have the right 'tune'!
Why was the British Empire a great chef? They knew how to whip up a proper 'stew'!
The British Empire always had a plan; they were good at 'Empire-ing' their resources!
What did the British Empire say at the party? 'Let’s keep it 'crown' and 'country'!'
The British Empire's favorite drink? 'Tea-rrific' punch!
Why did the British Empire start a band? They wanted to make some 'royal' noise!
I asked the British Empire for advice, and they said, 'Just keep calm and carry on!'

Ottoman Empire Puns

Why did the Ottoman Empire love tea? Because they couldn't resist a good 'brew'!
The Ottoman Empire had the best carpets; they really knew how to 'weave' a good tale!
Why was the Sultan always cool? He knew how to keep his 'harem' in check!
I tried to join the Ottoman army, but they said I wasn't 'sultanic' enough!
Why did the Ottoman Empire excel in architecture? They really knew how to 'dome' it right!
I asked the Ottoman Empire for advice on cooking, and they said, 'Just spice it up!'
What did the Ottoman soldier say to his friend? 'You’re looking quite 'sultanic' today!'
Why did the Ottoman Empire love music? They were always looking for a good 'tune' to conquer!
I tried to sell my art to the Ottoman Empire, but they said it was a bit 'baroque'!
Why did the Ottomans excel at diplomacy? They knew how to 'negotiate' a good deal!
The Ottoman Empire's favorite dance? The 'Sultanic' shuffle!
Why did the Ottoman Empire never get lost? They always had a good 'sense of direction'!
I asked an Ottoman how to relax, and they said, 'Just take a 'hammam' break!'
What did the Ottoman say at the bakery? 'I knead some bread!'
Why was the Ottoman Empire so great at storytelling? They had a lot of 'sultan' tales!
The Ottoman Empire loved sports; they were always playing 'sultan' ball!
Why did the Ottoman Empire bring a ladder to the bar? To reach for the high 'spirits'!
What’s the Ottoman Empire’s favorite dessert? 'Baklava' you believe it!
I wanted to start a fashion line inspired by the Ottomans, but I couldn't find the right 'fabric'!
Why did the Ottoman Empire love puzzles? They were great at fitting the 'pieces' together!
The Ottoman Empire's favorite game? 'Sultanic' chess!

Mongol Empire Puns

Why did Genghis Khan always carry a pen? In case he needed to draw his sword!
The Mongol Empire loved horseback riding; they were always 'galloping' to success!
What did the Mongol say to his horse? 'You really 'mane' it for me!'
Why was the Mongol Empire so good at archery? They really knew how to 'aim' high!
I tried to start a business with the Mongols, but they said I was 'too soft'!
Why did the Mongol Empire love the winter? Because they were great at 'chilling' out!
What’s a Mongol’s favorite type of comedy? 'Horseplay'!
Why did the Mongol Empire excel at trading? They knew how to 'barter' with the best!
I told my friend I wanted to join the Mongol Empire, but he said it was a 'horse' of a different color!
Why did the Mongol always carry a map? He didn't want to get 'lost in translation'!
What did the Mongol warrior say after a successful raid? 'That was 'un-fore-told'!'
Why did the Mongol Empire love music? They had a great 'tune' for victory!
I asked a Mongol how to stay fit, and he said, 'Just saddle up and ride!'
What did the Mongol say to his team? 'Let’s 'conquer' this game!'
Why was the Mongol Empire great at networking? They knew how to 'gather' allies!
The Mongol Empire's favorite drink? 'Kombucha' for the win!
What did the Mongol say at the party? 'Let's 'horse' around!'
Why did the Mongol Empire always win at cards? They had a great 'deck' of strategies!
What did the Mongol warrior say to his foe? 'Prepare for a 'riding' challenge!'
Why did the Mongol Empire love nature? They really knew how to 'horse' it up!
I asked a Mongol for advice on traveling, and he said, 'Just go with the flow!'

Persian Empire Puns

Why did the Persian Empire love gardening? They had a knack for 'cultivating' greatness!
What did the Persian say to his date? 'You're quite 'persian' to my heart!'
The Persian Empire had the best rugs; they really knew how to 'weave' their magic!
Why did the Persian Empire excel at poetry? They had a way with 'words' of wisdom!
What did the Persian say when he won a race? 'I ran like the wind, but with a 'carpet' ride!'
Why was the Persian Empire so good at cooking? They always had the right 'spices' for success!
What did the Persian king say when he conquered a new land? 'That's 'royal' business!'
Why did the Persian Empire love philosophy? They enjoyed 'thinking' outside the box!
What’s a Persian’s favorite dessert? 'Baklava' of course!
Why did the Persian always carry a mirror? To reflect on his 'beauty'!
What did the Persian say at the art gallery? 'This is quite a 'masterpiece'!'
The Persian Empire loved festivals; they really knew how to 'celebrate' life!
Why did the Persian Empire start a band? To get in 'tune' with the times!
What did the Persian say about his new clothes? 'These are 'fit' for a king!'
Why did the Persian Empire have great architecture? They really knew how to 'build' their dreams!
What did the Persian warrior say to his team? 'Let’s 'conquer' the competition!'
Why was the Persian Empire always happy? They had a 'carpet' full of joy!
What did the Persian poet say at the cafe? 'Let's sip tea and talk 'verses'!'
Why did the Persian trader always win at bargaining? He had a way with 'deals'!
What did the Persian say at the dance? 'Let’s 'twirl' in style!'
Why was the Persian Empire great at hosting? They always had a 'royal' touch!